THE STAGES OF MARRIAGE IN TURKISH CULTURE
Marriage has an important
role in Turkish culture. For a good marriage, the most important step is to
find a right partner. There are two ways to find a partner. Either people find
someone to get married themselves or their family choose someone to get married to them. The truth is that they
need time before marriage. After deciding to get married with a right partner,
there are three stages which are to agree to give in a marriage, to get engaged
and wedding in Turkish culture.
The first stage of a
marriage is to agree to give in a marriage. In this stage, groom’s side comes
to the bride’s home with a box of chocolate and a flower bouquet. The bride
makes coffee for her guests and she adds some salt in the groom’s cup of coffee.
That he drinks this coffee means that he is a patient person. Then the groom’s
father asks the expectation of bride’s side from marriage. Both families reach
an agreement to marry. After that, the bride and groom kiss the hands of the
elders. This stage is like a small engagement.
The second stage of a
marriage is to get engaged. This ceremony generally is held in the bride’s home.
After deciding a date for engagement ceremony, bride and groom’s neighbors are
invited it. Quests come and engagement rings are worn to the bride and groom's
right hand fingers by an old man with some words and wishes. In some
ceremonies, they cut their special engagement cake. Today, many engagement
ceremonies are held in a big wedding hall.
In this type of ceremonies, people play with a music and engagement is
celebrated by families and friends like a wedding ceremony. Finally, there is
no rule about the length of the engagement. It depends on the decision of the
bride and groom.
The final stage of a marriage
is the wedding. All marriages require a civil ceremony, conducted by a
municipal officer. It is a legal ceremony and also there is a religious
ceremony a few days ago from a civil ceremony. Before the wedding day, there is
an entertaining henna night. In this night, bride’s hands are applied with
henna. In a wedding ceremony, the groom wears a wedding suit, bride wears a
white dress, called bridal. Before the ceremony, the bride writes her single friends’
names under her shoes. It is believed that the girl whose name is deleted will
get married as soon as possible. Generally, wedding ceremonies are held in a
wedding hall with music and dancing. The guests are worn their presents such as
a bracelet or golden to the bride. But
in some regions, it is held in open areas with the traditional instruments such
as drum and flute. It is called village wedding. This type
of wedding ceremonies
starts on Friday and end on Saturday.
In Turkish culture,
there are three stages of a marriage. With the different tradition, all these stages
are important for a traditional Turkish marriage because marriage is the
foundation of families.
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